Friday 20 March 2009

I love ladies who are hot....and all ladies are hot

Hey-o yall!

Well today I was walking jauntily down the street after investing in a cheap pair of avater sunnys and was feeling pretty cool...then I caught sight of myself in a window and you know what without sounding like a total douche I looked pretty good...in a white trash bohemian indie kid kind of way...but this got me to thinking in a round about way about Body image...

Now as a lady who likes to oggle other ladies I have to say I love every shape and every size I think the womanly form is a sexified thing. Seriously woman are great they have curves and boobs and smell good and have boobs and are alluring and have boobs....boobs...basicly I like woman...A LOT

I have to say the gay ladies for the majority have a seriously healthy attitude towards both their own body image and that of others. Now I'm not saying we're all hippy dippy everyone is beautiful colony because there really is a lot of meat marketing that goes on but in general we're pretty good at enjoying all sorts of womanly delights. For example you'll see a couple that to the straight world will make no sense, like I don't know a chubby butch girl with a lil femme...or 2 butches...or 2 femmes etc. etc. etc. and that really does make me feel proud to be part of this community...

Here's what I've found...in my experiance it is STRAIGHT WOMAN that cause all this cafuffle about being skinny and big headed with your ribs showing. Now PLEASE don't hate me I know we have been conditioned by men in suits to think this, and I blame the fashion industry...seriously who thought it's be a good idea to get gay men that want to dress 12 year old boys to dress grown woman? It's dumb dumb dumb! But what I'm saying is straight woman are a million times bitchier about the way someone looks....why all the insecurity? why are woman turning on each other constantly? it baffles the hell out me....

Prime Example

Miss Kelly Clarkson I'm sure you'll all agree she is a very very very attractive woman, and recently she's reappeared looking (in my opinion) a lot better, she's a healthier weight and looks GREAT...however I was disgusted with my staight housemate who insisted on declaring how FAT she is and how she "shouldn't be on TV looking like that, she's letting her fans down"...WTF!?!?!? I'm her fan and she sure as hell hasn't let ME down

Maybe I'm being too harsh on the straight ladies but that's just my experiances.

We need to STOP hating ourselves and I know I'm one of the worst people to be saying this...or maybe the best...it's no secret that I don't like the way I look, it's something I've always struggled with since I was a little bit of a thing so I'm gonna work on that...if you guys promise to as well.

We're all woman and that alone makes us beautiful

I mean we have boobs instead of man parts and that alone is cause for celebration

OK I'm off to watch ANTM Lladies be frickin' FIERCE!

Cherry Cherry Boom Boom

Em
x

BMPL ANNOUNCEMENT!



Sorry Bridget

Cherry Cherry Boom Boom

Emuh
x

Tuesday 10 March 2009

Being Gay and single....

Can you spot the theme this week?

Well this isn't a whine about being single....this is more....a quick ramble about how being Gay and single disrupts your life....

To avoid long winded complaining and soul searching I'm going to try and do this in list form....


1-Comming out and STAYING out: Yerp it's tough for anyone to come out but once you're OUT it's very tough to get people to take you seriously if you haven't got a partner. It's the old:

"Oh this is a phase...you're not REALLLLLLY gay because you're not actually dating anyone....so you're not doing it, you're not gay"

o.O

When a straight person is single (or the most part) people don't question their "straight-ness"....no ones going up to Bridget Jones and saying "Yo Bridget maybe you like minge!" because she's a single girl....do you see what I mean?

Parents re really bad at this "single=not really gay" thing...it gives them a slightly weird hope that you can't get rid off not matter what you say, you could wear rainbow pjs in a gaypride parade waving a flag that says "I <3 Vaginas" and they will still try and set you up with George form next door....

It is really tough to keep telling people "I AM ACTUALLY GAY AS THE DAY IS LONG!!!" but keep it up because you don't come out once you come out at least twice a month....it is true

2-Self doubt aka "am I really Gay?"
syndrome- There is such a thing belive me it exists, I've had it, and know others who have so DO NOT PANIC! You can be the most out, proud lesbian ever but if you're single in the world, you'll still have those lonely moments where you think:

"Am I really? or is this just a phase/cry for attention/brain related problem"

Do not panic....when you aren't having any fun times you over-think EVERYTHING and start processing the littlest thing like when you watch Doctor Who and start developing impossible sexual feelings towards David Tennant....*looks around* cough.....but it's OK that doesn't make you straight....

3-All you're friends are in reletionships: This pretty self explanatory....yerp....

4-You don't seem to fit in at events: Really sucks going places alone....so either grit your teeth and go it alone or bribe your friend to go...it really isn't nice to go alone anywhere but occasionally it's a good idea because it's important to do things you like for yourself...also you just meet someone doing the thing you like...occasionally....so I'm told...

So that's it the bad times involved when your Gay and single....

Cherry Cherry Boom Boom

Em
x

THE REASON!!!

After simply YEARS of trying to figure out what the heck was up with the singles-ness I have finally discovered....THE REASON!!!



BAD TIMES!

Cherry Cherry BOOM BOOM

Em
x

Thursday 5 March 2009

"There are A LOT of crazy people out there....and you will date them"

"There are A LOT of crazy people out there....and you will date them"

Ok we all know what a whinney biatch I am about being single.....not gonna get into it....but I watched this video today....and without sounding super cheesy it SPOKE to me xD



(the girl also says "Not in a Bax" and that made me smile)

So why am I doing my monthly "Single hate hate hate" thing?Well my house mate used to be my buddy in crying about our singleness....cept now she's gone and got back togather with her American boyfriend and ergo I am truely the only single girl left in the entire university...if not the world.

Here's the deal with me...I WANT to date but I can't because I'm so frickin' afraid....

I have....THE FEAR!!! (SCARY ECHO VOICE)

You know THE FEAR!!!!!....?

That evil little nagging that makes you think really dumb things when you think you've meet someone you could possibly be in to?

Things like...

"Oh they don't really like me they're just being polite"
"Wow they're being nice to me...I'm no way good enough to be talking to this person"
"Oh they like me as a friend...it's because I'm funny...oh god stop telling jokes!"
"They're smiling and looking at me...clearly they want me to introduce them to my friend"
"Oh they made out with me that was a kind act of chariety"
"OK they have their hand on my ass...clearly they are trying to rob me"

You know all that kind of thing....So I'm appaling at it all but it's time to face facts

I'M DESTINED TO BE ALONE FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And you know what as long as I can have a Dog called Bunny and a Cat called Gilbert I can handle it BWAHAHAHAHA!!

This is all Rachels fault damn her and her happiness!

Tuesday 3 March 2009

Hey short girls...

Apparently I can only pull really short ladies...I have no problem with this...however I have one point

Attention all short ladies....

I am 5'10

you are small

wear heals and you won't bite my arm instead of my neck

Thank you