and now that I have your attention let me talk to you about gay sex.
I've gotten a few questions from young gay ladies about "OMG IT'S THE FIRST TIME WHAT DO I DO!?!?!" and the simple answer is whatever you feel comfortable with, there are no rules, and I'm sorry there is NO instruction manual (I looked trust me).
The first time I had sex with a woman was fucking petrifying, I wasn't really ready for it and in hindsight wish I'd have waited but I was very much in love and we were in Dublin and it was romantic, and she was American, and going home and and and....sigh. The following may be tmi but basically I erm "Dined downstairs" had no idea what I was doing and basically tried my best based on stuff I'd read in "The Joy of Lesbian Sex", the L word and the moans emitting from the headboard of the bunk bed.
However the first time I let a woman touch me at all she tried to fist me, the girl after that wouldn't even go near my vagina annnnd then things got slightly better. My life is one sexual disaster after another it seems but the key is to take it too seriously.
Don't panic, assuming you're with someone you trust there won't be a 5 inch thick dildo and a bunch of straps and wires to cope with. Let them know it's your first time and that you need to take it slow, if it's both your first times relax with each other and just start with kissing and not to sound like a total hippy sex counselor explore each other. It's going to be awkward, there's no way to avoid it, the first time you have sex with anyone it's going to be awkward, but it can be beautifully so. And don't feel just because you've started you have to finish the first time you're naked with whoever you're with take it at your own pace.
To give you some frank and honest advice the best thing (in my opinion) to do is just touch her, caress her all over and slowly work your way to her lady parts. This won't only give you some time to chillax it can be very arousing just being together and feeling each others touch can be one of the most pleasant things about sex in general not just lesbian sex, but I think it's one of the perks of lesbianism is the way a woman touches you is very different to the way a man touches you. Don't just go shoving as many fingers inside of her and jam away like they do in those pathetic porno, start slowly with one or two running around her pussy, don't neglect her clit either and just listen to what she wants. Communication is the absolute key because some people prefer being penetrated some people prefer just straight up clit stimulation don't be afraid to ask her. The one piece of advice I would give for penetration is the "come hither" finger movement and not so much in and out but more caressing her inside, and to quote the great Alice Pieszecki "circles, circles are good"
When it comes to "taking the plunge" so to speak I'd again say take your time and USE YOUR WHOLE TOUNGE if it's not for you don't think that doesn't make you not gay, there's more to sex than just oral.
The best advice I can give is communication, I'd recommend this for all sex but especially your first time. For the most part girls won't expect you go down on them the first time you sleep with them because it can be a little intense and don't be afraid to say "I'm not ready for that yet" . Also don't be afraid to ask her if what you're doing feels good a simple "is that ok?" will suffice and incidentally it's very fucking sexy to know the person you're sleeping with cares enough to ask.
All in all losing your gay virginity is no less or no more complicated than the first time you have straight sex, the key is to be relaxed, ready and communicate.
Have fun and play safe guys
Cherry cherry boom boom
Em
x
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